The Tilt Room » Cold Deck

ONLINE POKER IS RIGGED

Jim — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 05:44:40 +0000

COME ON MAN WHAT THE FFFFFF IS THIS?

Full Tilt Poker – No Limit Hold’em Cash Game – $1/$2 Blinds – 9 Players

SB: $239.50
BB: $280.15
Hero (UTG): $200.00
UTG+1: $38.00
MP1: $164.30
MP2: $282.30
MP3: $194.05
CO: $220.40
BTN: $239.05

Preflop: Hero is dealt A Q (9 Players)
Hero raises to $8.00, UTG+1 folds, MP1 calls $8.00, MP2 calls $8.00, 4 folds, BB calls $6.00

Flop: ($33) 2 A A (4 Players)
BB checks, Hero bets $26.00, MP1 folds, MP2 calls $26.00, BB folds

Turn: ($85) 2 (2 Players)
Hero bets $62.00, MP2 calls $62.00

River: ($209) A (2 Players)
Hero bets all-in for $104.00, MP2 calls $104.00

Pot Size: $417.00 ($3 Rake)

MP2 had 2.2 (four of a kind, Twos) and LOST (-$200.00)
Hero had A.Q (four of a kind, Aces) and WON (+$215.00)

What a joke. Online Poker is RIGGED.

FFS THEY GET SO LUCKY

Jim — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 16:08:16 +0000

OKAY WAS PLAYING A LOW STAKES LIVE GAME YESTERDAY – $1/$2 NO LIMIT HOLD’EM RIGHT? OKAY SO I HAVE 45 of CLUBS AND NOBODY RAISES SO I’M ON THE BUTTON AND I RAISE IT TO 6. I GET 3 CALLERS, AND GET EXCELLENT FLOP.

Ac Kc 8c

I DECIDE TO PLAY IT AGGR AND BET AS IF I HAVE AN ACE BUT NO CLUB RIGHT, THEY CHECK, I BET 14 AND GET ONE CALLER.

TURN = BLANK.

HE CHECKS, I BET 49 (yes), AND GET A CALL.

RIVER: 3c

HE CHECKS, I CHECK. HE SHOWS Ah9c.

WAW THEY PLAY SO BAD AND THEY GET SO LUCKY.

HE CALLS ME WITH THE 9c AND THEN DECIDES NOT TO BET IT? ASSDONKS!

ZOMG TILTAMENTS

Jim — Fri, 02 May 2008 18:15:52 +0000

OKAY SO I HAVE LIKE THE BIG BLIND AND I’M HOLDING QQ. I RAISE AFTER SIX DONKS LIMPED IN AND I GET 4 CALLERS. NICE CALL DONKS IS IN MY HEAD BUT I DONT SAY IT BECAUSE HEY THEY MIGHT HEAR IT AND KNOW I AM PROPLAYER RIGHT SO AIGHT FLOP COMES QKT. GOOD FLOP BUT NOT PERFECT SO I BET RIGHT OUT WITH LIKE 3/4 POT SIZE BET AND ONE DONKAMENTER MOVES IN FOR LIKE $200 MORE AIGHT WHO GIVES A SHIT I SAY IF HE HAS AJ I HAVE OUTS SO I PREPARE TO CALL WHEN BEHIND HIM ONE IDIOTA MOLAJA DOES AN ALL-IN CALL, HE HAD LIKE $100 SO NO BIGGIE BUT WHAT THE FUDGE RIGHT AIGHT SO ONE MORE DUDE CALLS SO I THINK TO MYSELF HE HAS AK CLUBS AS THERE WERE TWO CLUBS ON BOARD.

WITH MY QUEENS I FEEL OBLIGOTERATED TO MAKE THE CALL SO I SHOVE ALL-IN I HAD LIKE $600 AND DONKBALL WITH AK CLUBS CALLS TOO. I WAS RIGHT. ONE DUDE HAS AJ. THE OTHER ONE WITH THE $200 HAS KJ. KJ I’M NOT FREAKING KIDDING.

TURN IS AN ACE, RIVER THE FREAKING CASE KING. DONKAMENT WINS MAIN POT. I ALMOST KILLED HIM. ONE-OUTER MY ASS.

SOME DONKS REALLY ARE CLUELESS

Jim — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 01:40:56 +0000

CLUELESS. NO SHIT. CLUELESS.

IF YOU FEEL LIKE FUDGING CALLING MY PRE-FLOP RAISE (WHICH I ONLY DO ONCE EVERY ONE OR TWO ORBITS) WITH NINE FOUR OFF SUIT, WOULD YOU FREAKING MIND NOT MAKING A DONKAMENT STRAIGHT FREAKING FLUSH ON ME WITH A ONE-OUTER ON THE MOTHERBADGING RIVER?

I’M SO TIRED OF THIS CRAP I FEEL LIKE STRANGLING SOMEONE THROUGH THE INTERNET CABLE.

BAH!

IT MIGHT SUCK TO GET A BEAT…

Jim — Sat, 12 Apr 2008 18:23:34 +0000

BUT I LOVE READING ABOUT BAD BEATS WHEN OTHER PEOPLE ARE VICTIMS HAHAHAHA LOOK AT THIS GUY COMPLAINING ABOUT LOSING TOP SET AGAINST 57OS! :S

CAN I GET A WOOPWOOP?

ACE FOUR OFF SUIT

Jim — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 03:29:26 +0000

ACE FOUR OFF SUIT IS NOT A GOOD HAND I KNOW BUT JEEZES CHRIST I HAD BEEN RUNNING GOOD SO I CALLED A LITTLE RAISE BEFORE THE FLOP AND THE FLOP WAS ACE ACE NINE WHICH WAS AWESOME RIGHT SO I CHECKED THE FLOP AND THE DONKEY BET AND I JUST SMOOTHCALLED AWESOME STUFF AS HE WOULD BET AGAIN ON THE TURN WHICH WAS WHAT I WANTED OBVIOUSLY SO AAIGHT CHILLING TURN CARD A FOUR!!!!!!!!

RIGHT WITH THE 4 ON THE BOARD I WAS NOW THE PIMP DADDY AS I HAD A DAMN FULL HOUSE INNIT?

SO THE GUY BET AND I RAISED MINIMUM AND HE MOVED ALL IN AND I CALLED AND HE HAD ACE NINE BETTER FULL HOUSE ME DRAWING DEAD.

FULL TILT POKER MY BATTY